Badger Learns to Swim

By Justine C. Tajonera

Miraculously I watched my son swimming. My mouth was agape and I was speechless for about two minutes. This was all thanks to my husband.

It started with a near accident. Now that we've relocated to a condo with access to an indoor pool, we've been taking daily dips. On one occasion I was happily floating and didn't notice that my husband was doing a lap, leaving Badger standing at the edge of the pool. Vier later explained that he was confident Badger wouldn't do anything on his own because he knew how deep the water was. Contrary to this assumption, Badger thought I would catch him and jumped into the pool. Vier noticed this but he was at the other end of the pool. He never swam faster!

This was when he noticed that Badger didn't go under. He was kicking and flailing his arms for dear life, managing to keep his head above the water until Vier rushed to his rescue. Vier decided that Badger was ready to swim.

The next time we went swimming, Vier told Badger to swim to mommy. I was skeptical. But swim he did. He was able to cross three feet to me! I was amazed. He was crying by the time he reached me but he did it all on his own. I scolded Vier for possibly traumatizing him but Vier insisted that, with time, Badger would get used to it without all my "babying."

We've modified the activity by having him bring his toys (around 5 to 6 interlocking blocks) to the pool. I let the toys float a little farther away from him and he's motivated to swim and "rescue" his toys. It's absolutely amazing! It's like watching him take his first steps. He has good form: kicking feet, scooping arms (to get him to his destination). Not a breast stroke yet but on the way! He wasn't just dog paddling in place. He was swimming! And once he assembled his toys, he lost no time in getting absorbed in his imaginative play: transformers at sea or speed boats racing.

I guess when he gets older my joke to him will be: You learned to swim before you learned to go to the toilet! Haha! An athlete in the making.

Next challenge? Potty training!

(Dec. 28, 2009)


Image from http://www.flickr.com/photos/brianauer/2599299352/

Getting Badger To Brush His Teeth: The Art Of Diversion

By Justine C. Tajonera

Vier and I bought this audio book, Talking To Toddlers, and we learned a lot from it but I had some difficulty putting it into practice, at first, because I was so used to dealing with Badger in a fixed sort of way. However, one night, one of the lessons on diversion really kicked in.

The Dreaded Temper Tantrum
Badger and I had our usual fight over brushing his teeth. I was pretty tense because Vier is usually the one who brushes Badger's teeth. However, that night, it was up to me. I tried cajoling him. I tried giving him options (do you want to brush with your yellow toothbrush or your Ironman toothbrush?), I tried getting mad but nothing worked. He ended up screaming at the top of his lungs (with the vein on his neck popping out). I was about to give up. He was already crying, which I really hate because I start getting soft on him when I see those big tears rolling down his cheeks.

Mommy's Best Actress Skills
And then the idea hit me. Why not use the lesson on diversion? In the audio lesson, it was explained that sometimes logic really won't work with young kids. So, the best thing you can do is divert them so that they don't focus on what they don't like. So, with all my "best actress" skills I exclaimed: "Oh my goodness! Badger! Are those ants in your mouth?" He stopped crying and looked positively shocked. He's scared of cockroaches. And now, ants, after one of them bit him."I think I see ants!" I went on. "Open your mouth wide so that Mommy can check." Immediately, he opened his mouth for inspection. "Ay naku," I said, shaking my head, "looks like there are cockroaches and ants in there.Tsk tsk! We have to take them out."


Finally, Cooperation
By this time, Badger was getting cooperative. "Take out ants," he demanded. "Okay, Mommy needs to brush your teeth to get the ants out, okay?" He nodded and opened his mouth wide. And that was the end of my ordeal. I made a big deal about how we were getting rid of all the ants in his mouth and he was happy to have them out of his mouth. In a way, brushing his teeth really is a way of getting rid of "bugs" and cavity-building plaque from his mouth. So, not only did he get to brush his teeth, we had fun doing it.

The Art Of Diversion In The Grocery
The art of diversion is fascinating. One other miraculous way it helped was when Badger had a temper tantrum in the grocery (the thing that parents absolutely hate). This time, it was Vier who took the lead. Badger insisted on getting a ball from the toy section and we really didn't have time for it. So, Badger started bawling and pulling us back towards the toy section. Vier then asked him, "Do you like that ball?" When Badger said yes, Vier kept asking him to describe the ball (like what color was it?, etc.) and engaged him in a conversation about the ball. By the time we were in another section of the grocery, they were busy exclaiming over blue colored cans (because Badger likes the color blue) and we were off the topic of the ball already. Thank goodness!

(Dec. 16, 2009)

Image from http://www.flickr.com/photos/aliedwards/522650932/

Badger's Ta-dah! and The Amazing Feat Of Self-Praise

By Justine C. Tajonera

I was so surprised to hear Badger exclaim, "ta-dah!" by himself, one day. Upon further investigation, I found out that he had lined up his cars neatly and had counted them successfully up to six. So it went like: "One! Two! Three! Four! Five! Six! Ta-dah!" It was such a cute moment and so heartwarming to see him so proud of his own accomplishment.

Because of this behavior, I became interested in self-praise. I got to read an article by Michael Grose, a parenting educator and parent coach, on the impact of praise and found out that praise can be really great for a child's self-esteem. But, given all the hype about the wrong kind of praise, I was careful about what I read online. Looks like the article was spot-on, with emphasis on giving descriptive (or specific) praise, summary (or label) praise and encouraging self-praise.

Another article by Robert Hughes, Jr.,talks about how self-praise is very different from bragging. Bragging puts other kids or play mates down while self-praise is very specific to one's own behavior and how it has improved. It's one way your child can acknowledge that he is proud of himself (at no one's expense). 

Self-praise doesn't happen in a vacuum. Kids learn to praise themselves because their parents are also very encouraging. I'm happy that Badger is starting early.

(Dec. 14, 2009)

Image from http://www.flickr.com/photos/85278812@N00/3232401919

Free Play And My Transportation Obsessed Son

by Justine C. Tajonera

My son absolutely adores cars. He lines up his dad's Ferrari cars on the floor every night and counts them. Whenever he's riding the car with us he identifies all kinds of transportation on the road: car! motorcycle (pronounced motowsayel)! truck! taxi!

Once, while he was playing with his cars, he "borrowed" my USB with a wire and used it to put gas into each car. How ingenious was that?

Recently, I taught him that the traffic lights mean something: green means go and red means stop. So, every time we are at a stop light, our irrepressible son screams: GREEN MEANS GO! or RED MEANS STOP! It's hilarious!

It's amazing how our kids really have minds of their own. I really don't have any particular fascination for cars: they're pretty utilitarian for me. Vier likes cars but not really that much. A strange confluence of events (Vier's recent collection of Ferraris due to the Shell promo and our recent decision to acquire a motorcycle (to save gas) resulted in our son being obsessed over all kinds of transportation.

I've learned that feeding my son's natural passions makes him more animated and happy. He can just keep playing with his blocks and mounting them in his toy tractor for a long time. I don't "force" him to do what I want anymore. I wait for his cues and engage him in conversations about what he loves.

Image from http://www.public-domain-photos.com/free-cliparts/signs_and_symbols/other/traffic_light_green_dan__01-7254.htm

New Moon and Melodramatic Daughters: The Twilight Saga from a Parent's Point of View

By Justine C. Tajonera

I joined giddy tweeners and teenagers last Friday, lining up to watch the movie, New Moon. Like a lot of them, I also read the books. In fact, I have my own team: Team Edward. I've heard others have switched to Team Jacob because of Taylor Lautner's hot bod which deserves its own credit. I enjoyed the whole saccharine bit of the movie, not caring what the critics say.

Actually, I had a weird sensation of seeing myself enjoy the movie both as the young girl that I was and as the parent that I now am. You see, I was a melodramatic daughter. I loved drama. When I fell in love, I fell in love really hard. I actually remember being Bella: all earnest heartache, all reckless emotion. I was the kind of daughter who rebelled over love (or what my parents must have called "puppy love"). It sounds funny now. But it wasn't funny then. Nope. It meant the world to me.

So, I actually invite parents who are skeptical over the books and the movie to consider entering their daughter's world. You have no idea what might be going on. Any kind of emotion that your child is going through is serious business for her. Consider that she puts her whole heart into something. But what does she know, right? She doesn't know what the world's like. She has no idea that what she's feeling is just infatuation or the pale shadow of what we know is real love. But she doesn't know that.

The books and the movie are popular. That can't be denied. Is it good for your kids? You might disagree. But what you can do is enter your daughter's world. You might have the best of intentions. You might be protecting her for her own good. But you need to see it from her side, too.

I also saw myself as either Edward's or Jacob's mom. Actually, as early as now, I worry over what kind of gentleman my son turns out to be. Even at almost three years old, he is as Bella called Jacob, beautiful. When he grows up, he will break a few hearts just by walking down the street. Because I've been Bella, I worry over the girls who will love him. It's a happy problem, really, because my son is the sweetest thing. I want to raise a boy who will know how to love and respect women. I want to raise a boy who will love with all his heart and treat girls graciously: the pretty ones, the plain ones, the ones who are audacious and the ones who are shy, the reserved ones and the melodramatic ones.

So, while you might think New Moon is all hype and Dear Diary trash, please be curious and take the time to watch it. If only only to enter the world of your children and see what's going on: their earnest yearnings, their repressions, their ideas about love, their heartbreaking choices, their funny questions, their weird logic.


(Nov. 21, 2009)

Badger and Charlie Bird: Engaging Your Child On All Levels

by Justine C. Tajonera

Lately, we've gotten sick of listening to Badger's CD, "Charlie Bird Counts to the Beat." He got it as a gift from his Tita Ines. It was part of a set: a lovely and colorful board book and an accompanying music CD. It's under this book series called "Baby Loves Jazz." We got it a long time ago but we never really appreciated it until now since Badger can already talk.

He loves it to death. He counts to it and he kind of sings to it (in his cute off key way). I couldn't believe that he actually loves the jazz beat. After countless road trips listening to Barney, it was refreshing to hear something different (and something that an adult could appreciate as well). The thing with our toddler is he loves repetition. He can't get enough of Charlie Bird.

I would recommend the whole set up to other parents: interact with your kids on different levels. What's nice about Charlie Bird is that there's a book that he can refer to so he sees different colors and animals and then there's the jazz beat that he can hear and relate to each picture in the book. That way, he's fully engaged. It's also great that the numbers are also spelled out so now he's interested in the way the numbers are spelled and it's going to lead him to his first reading forays one of these days.

Image from http://www.friendshiphouse.com

Badger's New Craze: Purble Place

This game comes free with Windows Vista. Badger really loves it. There are three games in Purble Place:

• Comfy Cakes - Badger liked assembling cakes based on a picture order. It helps him follow instructions. He's great at it. And he even cheers for himself when he gets a cake delivered.
  
• Purble Pairs - is a simple memory game. Badger does trial and error here but I'm really amazed at how he remembers where the right pictures are. 
• Purble Shop - this is a game of logic and recognition. Badger's goal is to guess the right features of the character hiding behind the curtain based on previous choices. By using logic, he can guess what other features are missing. According to Vier, Badger was able to guess correctly with just a few tries the first time he played it. 

Aside from Starfall, Badger likes this playing this computer-based game. It's still fresh for him and it's pretty challenging. After a while he might get bored, though, because it's PC installed and not a game that keeps adapting (unlike the Starfall website). It's a great teaching aid because it's so much fun.

I just make sure to be with him while he plays so that he can share the game with me and it becomes more interactive as I cheer him on or when he asks for my help. 

(Oct. 20, 2009)

Our Favorite Counting Activity: Kisses!

By Justine C. Tajonera

I discovered a wonderful way to practice counting with Badger. We count kisses. When he asks me for something like a toy or "mamam" (nursing), I ask him to say "please" first and I ask for x number of kisses.

We do a countdown until the last kiss. I hold up my fingers and he says the number. It's a great way for us to bond and a lovely way to watch him practice his counting skills.

It's amazing how much progress he's made over the months. I really treasure every moment I get a sloppy kiss from Badger. He's growing up so fast.

(Oct. 13, 2009)

Badger's Top 15 Favorite Things

I've never taken the time before to actually do this. So, before the opportunity passes by, I'm recording Badger's top 15 favorite things at 2 years old and 10 months. This is not in any order:

1. Race cars (he has six Shell Ferrari toy cars from his dad. He's very creative with them... like he creates traffic jams and improvises gasoline stations)
2. Swimming (no matter the weather)
3. Jollibee
4. McDo
5. Potchi (gummy candies, he can also dance to the TV ad jingle)
6. Pizza
7. Pancakes
8. Hot dog
9. Baby Einstein videos
10. Finding Nemo (he can watch this over and over and over again)
11. Barney
12. Chupachups Lollipops
13. Mamam (nursing from mommy)
14. Mommy's cellphone (for the camera and the Snakes game)
15. Puppy (Taco Bell stuffed toy puppy given by Tita Aling)

This list will keep changing as he grows. But I'm glad we took notice of all these things. One day, we'll look back and laugh at how obsessed he was over these favorites. In the meantime, I enjoy every day that I'm with this amazing little boy. He never ceases to teach me new things.

Breastfeeding and Calamities

by Justine C. Tajonera

I just recently read a blog post by Mommy Mec of LATCH (Lactation, Attachment, Training, Counseling, Help) regarding the importance of breastfeeding especially during natural disasters.

Breastfeeding has a lot of benefits, but these are much more emphasized during emergencies. According to a UN News Report on Breastfeeding, babies and small children are particularly at risk for diarrhea, pneumonia and under-nutrition during natural disaters. “The life-saving role [of breastfeeding] during emergencies is firmly supported by evidence and guidance,” WHO Director-General Margaret Chan said in the news report.


Read here also a blog report on the Chinese police officer who became a national and international hero after she breastfed nine infants after an earthquake.

Breastfeeding ensures that a child is getting proper nutrition without the need for sterilized bottles or water. No matter what the situation, breast milk is at the proper temperature, is clean, safe and provides the child with immunological benefits and probiotics. Not only is it good for the child's health, breastfeeding calms down a child and provides him or her a safe haven during such a stressful time.


Let's promote breastfeeding in the Philippines, ensuring our children's health on regular days and most especially, during disasters and natural calamities.


Acknowledging the picture source here. The picture is of heroic Chinese police officer Jiang Xiaojuan breastfeeding an infant who was separated from her parents.

Making the Most of Hospitalization

By Justine C. Tajonera

Last Sept. 15, Badger accidentally ingested nail polish remover. I only knew because he started vomiting. It was one of my worst moments as a parent. I felt like a headless chicken, all panicky and disoriented. It's a good thing Vier is always so clear headed and calm. He asked me to call our pedia who immediately advised us to get him to the ER. The doctor in the ER called up the Poison Control Center and recommended that we admit him for observation.

We had him admitted. The worst part, for me, was the whole dextrose process because he wasn't allowed to drink or eat for 24 hours. The nurses had to stick needles into both his hands because Badger was violently fighting them off. It was so painful to hold Badger while he begged us to take off the needle and the tube.

Badger was finally released the following day, Sept. 16. Here are some things that I observed that helped me and Vier make the most of Badger's hospitalization:

1. Always keep a calm disposition. Even though your blood pressure is rising because it's the nth time that the nurse is finding your child's vein. I realized that it would help no one if I scolded or got angry. I made sure that I did not react emotionally to anything that the hospital staff was doing but rather, rationally. Also, don't waste beating yourself up over what happened. What happened happened. And then move forward.

2. Take advantage of a tag team. I realized that I was able to cope better because Vier and I made sure to get all the help we needed so that neither of us were harassed. I would attend to the Philhealth papers while Vier accompanied Badger to the hospital room. I would take care of the paper work at the cashier while Vier talked to the ER resident.

3. Be assertive and get full explanations for any recommendations. Just because the hospital is recommending something, it doesn't mean that we have to take everything hook, line and sinker. We talked to both our pediatrician and the assigned doctor. We decided to go with the initial recommendation to admit him overnight but when the doctor advised us that we needed to keep him in the hospital for another 24 hours, we disagreed. He had already stabilized and he was suffering more from the IV than from his stomach. So, we signed a waiver, got instructions for his diet and bought his follow-up medicine.

4. Be firm but compassionate with your child. As parents, we knew that he had to be admitted. No matter how hard he fought it, we had to help the nurses insert the IV into his vein. Badger was so angry, confused and frustrated. All I could do was show him how much I loved him. I would hug him and try to divert his attention from his constant requests to take off the IV. We would read him stories, tell him jokes, sing to him, play games with him and surprise him with inexpensive toys (like the gag glasses in the picture).

As parents, there will always be the possibility that our children will be admitted to the hospital. To help cope with this situation, I would recommend: always keeping calm, taking advantage of a tag team with your partner or family members, asserting your right as parents and getting full explanations for all recommendations and being firm but loving and compassionate with your child during such a trying time.

See my poem about Badger's hospitalization: Pinprick

A Field Trip to Pansol and Calamba, Laguna

By Justine C. Tajonera

Kids learn not only from books and lessons at home. Going to new places and seeing new things greatly stimulate their inborn love for learning, no matter what their learning style is.

A great itinerary for busy parents is a trip out of town, not too far from Manila. Why not go south-bound and check out the treasures in Laguna?

Pansol, Laguna has a lot of private pools that are filled with hot spring water. So even during this rainy season, you can be assured of "nginig-proof" swimming pleasure whatever time of the night or morning it is. An overnight stay could cost as low as P2K or as high as P8K depending on the number of people who are staying at the rental.

On the way home, stop by the Rizal Shrine in Calamba. You'll see a rebuilt replica of Rizal's first home (bahay na bato) and you'll see some really interesting sights from his childhood. There's an Audio-Video area where they play a Rizal documentary. Your kids will be fascinated with the contraptions of the Spanish colonization era and you can treat them to an impromptu history lesson. In the yard, there will be a bahay kubo where your kids can have their picture taken and there's also a bronze statue of Jose Rizal as a child with his dog, Syria.

Check out my poem: The Childhood of a Hero
Check out the pictures from our trip

A Trip to the Secondhand Bookstore

By Justine C. Tajonera

It was wonderful to plan an afternoon adventure with my toddler. After his afternoon nap, I asked him if he wanted to take a walk. He already knows how exciting it is to walk the dog (our Dalmatian, Sparta) so he didn't hesitate with his "Yes!!!"

Together with Yaya, Badger and I walked from the house to Roces Avenue and climbed up to the second floor of the building where Chocolate Kiss is and rang the doorbell to "Books for Less." Badger went nuts choosing from all the books on display. We sat on a little table and laid out all his choices. Of course, Mommy had the veto right. We wanted a couple of Dr. Seuss books but one of them was too vandalized and the other one had musical notes which I wasn't sure Badger would be able to appreciate. We finally settled on four books: a biblical re-telling of The Prodigal Son, titled The Lost Son (he liked it because you can literally pull out the "son" from the cover and it acts like a bookmark), Alpabetong Pinoy (published by Adarna House and first spotted on the July issue of Smart Parenting), Tight Times (in both English and Filipino, also published by Adarna House), and his favorite of the batch, Fuzzy Yellow Ducklings, a touch-and-read book which he absolutely adored because of all the textures and colors on each page.

So, we not only got to exercise (around 300 meters worth of walking), but we also got to save a lot of money and discovered new things that Badger liked! His book preference really demonstrated to me how Badger is so kinesthetic or tactile in his learning style.

After thirty minutes of book browsing, we capped our afternoon with Baked Potato, iced tea and a slice of carrot cake. 

For more information on learning styles, check out Learning Styles Online.

Teaching Badger at Home

I started finding ways to teach Badger at home ever since Badger was evaluated as speech delayed last January. Everyone kept telling me that it's okay because "boys are usually late to talk." But I didn't see the harm in giving it our best shot. Because I was busy at work and Vier was busy with our business ventures, we enrolled him in occupational therapy (OT) and we pitched in based on suggestions from his teacher. Badger would still attempt to talk but we still couldn't make sense of what he was saying. It was hard to get him a slot with a speech therapist so we just continued with his OT. I discovered a free website resource for home schooling and teaching speech and reading to toddlers, starfall.com. It was a really great way to interact with Badger. He became adept at using a mouse and he would squeal with delight whenever he saw a new letter and played an online game.

Last April I had an ectopic pregnancy. It was a sad and traumatic experience for me but my maternity leave gave me two months to just concentrate on Badger. I even explored youtube videos on speech therapy strategies and attempted some of the activities with Badger. Then, something magical happened. During a friend's birthday party, Badger became antsy because it was getting late so I tried to play a game with him. I would say each letter of the alphabet and wait to see if he would follow. And he did! Right up to his funny pronunciation of "z." I wanted to cry. All my friends were amazed at how he was just going on and on. It was as if all the sessions with starfall and all my crude speech therapy attempts with him came together and something clicked. He was saying the alphabet! It was also wonderful that he could also identify each letter that he was saying because of his OT classes.

I was awed by what a little more time and a lot of love could do. I now believe that homeschooling is something that I should aim to do when he is ready for nursery.